Why can't men let go of the helm?

[pwensinger]

My observation is that, in 95% of boats, the men drive. It doesn't matter while under way, but this ratio exists while docking too. So the stronger of the couple sits on his a##, while the weaker grabs at whatever she can reach and, frequently, has to jump off the boat. Men, those pretty knees and legs we so admire are not as strong as ours. Meanwhile women are better at fine motor skills - like docking.

Shortly after my wife and I met, she tore her ACL skiing. She was still wearing a brace at the start of the next boating season. She couldn't jump. So I handled the lines and the jumping and she had the helm. It turned out that she was much better at it than I. So, 30 years later, she is still doing the docking and I'm the muscle.

I get her drinks too.

 

[GZigmont]

My Admiral is scared sh#tless to even think about learning to dock the boat. She has her boating license too. I have enough trouble getting her to take the helm while underway for some practice time. We’ve had all the discussions. It’s her choice to handle the dock lines and fenders. I single hand it as much as possible, which is fine. I’d be single handing it if she didn’t want to come along anyway.

 

[knotflying]

I think it is a matter of how a couple feels about one's capabilities. I would have loved it if my wife took the helm more often so I could do other things while cruising. We each know our capabilities. I always do the anchor while she takes the helm. I do not think it is a matter of gender. If you think you are just as capable as your husband at the helm then discuss switching roles.

 

[Submariner]

My observation is that, in 95% of boats, the men drive. It doesn't matter while under way, but this ratio exists while docking too. So the stronger of the couple sits on his a##, while the weaker grabs at whatever she can reach and, frequently, has to jump off the boat. Men, those pretty knees and legs we so admire are not as strong as ours. Meanwhile women are better at fine motor skills - like docking.

My wife prefers me to do the docking. But it is MY job to see to it that she sits on her a## while docking. She does not jump, leap, lasso, or tug and pull on anything. We exchange no swear words, no yelling. We rarely need to communicate at all during docking. I have to dock the boat such that she calmly, easily, and safely, can step off the boat.

A friend of ours is in her early 70's and operates a R27-OB solo, all by herself. That's my standard for docking. Even though I have my wife's "assistance", I shouldn't need it if I do my job at the helm. If I have to make 2 or 3 attempts, so be it.

When it comes time for fishing (crabbing, and shrimping), she is at the helm driving while I'm moving all the weighted pots, line and buoy's around.

 

[SlackwaterJack]

one reason..?..
- when she's at the side getting ready to jump she's not looking over my shoulder telling me I'm doing it wrong.


yes...I'm kidding... it's really because she tends to cuss a lot when she's behind the wheel :roll:

 

[Matty]

Anytime my wife corrects me or tells me " if I had just..." while docking I offer her the helm. Not once has she accepted the offer.
Having said that we have a great team process that works well. She also pilots while cruising.

 

[bob daily]

My wife does all the driving whether on the boat, in the car or truck. All I have to do is hold the wheel!
I am the head of our household, but my wife is the neck! And as we all know the neck turns the head which way it wants it to go! Bob

 

[CaptT]

My wife does all the driving whether on the boat, in the car or truck. All I have to do is hold the wheel!
I am the head of our household, but my wife is the neck! And as we all know the neck turns the head which way it wants it to go! Bob

After 49 years of marriage.....I'M WITH BOB!!

 

[bluestreak]

My wife is at the helm when we anchor or hook to a mooring ball.
Working on getting her more comfortable coming into the slip.
She has gone on the bow but that toe rail can be a little intimidating u/w.
When out autopilot went out, she took her trick at the wheel and did just fine station keeping on the boat we were traveling with.

 

[CruisingElvinRay]

why does it matter who’s driving?


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

[Matty]

I think that is the point of the posts. It doesn't.

 

[FWTMD]

We have this list of tasks that have to be done. Which one(s) do you want to take on? Or none, and I'll single-hand it?

Everyone likes choices to go along with some sense of participation.

I doubt my wife has attempted to parallel park since her drivers test. Close quarters boat handling is intimidating.